To say or not to say

Not many people take too kindly of what you say. And while you think that your intention is good, others take your action as being nosy, sabotaging or that you are being judgemental. This I have learned. I for one, am not a person who simply say things or say much, unless I am being asked to and unless I care. I always believed that you cannot change a person but every person deserved to be given a chance. Thus, I thought that by telling them the truth, they will hopefully be able to see the perspective of a third party so that they can improve... or so you think that they need improvement.

Well, I was in the situation where I stood in-between the promotion of a subordinate. As her superior, I know that it is only fair that I tell her the reasons for my objection so as she would be prepared to take up the challenge when the right time comes. Instead of taking my gesture positively, she goes round telling others that I stopped her promotion. I am not offended by what she says for I know that my intention is sincere. So I also realised that they may not think that they are at fault. That they have reasons to react in a certain way or that we have stepped on their boundaries for telling them your thoughts.

So I am not blaming them for thinking that way. I cannot stop them from thinking that way. But I do know that when one becomes defensive, that is when you stop learning. When you think highly of yourself, you stop learning. Sometimes when things does not go your way, do stop and think what is it that you have done. And it is not about who is right or who is wrong, or whether one is being fair or unfair but rather if your “actions” is respectable to not only others but most importantly to yourself. And when someone tells you of your shortcomings (no one is without), be glad that they did – for that would mean that they care.

Ever wonder why we are here?

A friend posted a question the other day, "Ever wondered to yourselves why we are here?" The truth is, this questions is one that oftens come to mind when I was young. That was the time where I search for answers to life and the time where I made a lot of mistakes, do the things that I know I shouldn't and the time that I rebel the most. And all these just to know my limits and how far I can go. Now that I am at my mid age... I have stopped wondering. I guess I have found my peace.

And I use to be very ambitious. I have a career goal in mind and I focused on what I want to achieve and move towards it. Today, I am where I am. At the level where I have worked very hard to be at. I know that if I want to, I will continue to go up. But somehow, as I grow older, my perspectives in life changed. I am no longer ambitious.

All I want is just to have a peaceful balance life and achieving high positions in career path is no longer in my agenda. And yet again, as fate has it, I was being head hunted for a GM position. I have declined the proposal, 3 months ago - now the offer is up again. It is not the fear of not performing but somehow, I don't think is the time yet... but then again, considering the many things that are happening right now, perhaps the time is right? Here I go.. back to wondering again..